


The one where Dave doesn’t feel so good and Tavros thought it’d be a good idea

by Lacertae



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Egg Hatching, Fiduspawn, M/M, Smuppets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-31
Updated: 2014-05-31
Packaged: 2018-01-27 19:19:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1719665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lacertae/pseuds/Lacertae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*Tavros/Dave* written for Bonus Round 1 at the Homestuck WorldCup.</p>
<p>Tavros decides to use smuppets as hosts for his fiduspawn eggs. Dave isn't exactly enthused.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The one where Dave doesn’t feel so good and Tavros thought it’d be a good idea

**Author's Note:**

> Traumatizing Dave is actually funny? Also, unless descriptions of egg hatching squick you, this is not bad. :) It does have a fluffy ending!

There were many things Dave regretted in his afterlife.  
  
He regretted being stuck forever inside his old apartment, instead of being somewhere else, somewhere cooler (even his daily visitors had to go back to their own dreambubbles for a while, or their ‘dream’ would start to weaken). He regretted not asking Aradia how to make food appear, even though he had no need for it anymore –though thankfully he’d learned it anyway, and now his pantry was filled with doritos and apple juice and pizza. But he was regretful because it had taken him months, while she could have helped him right away.  
  
But most of all, he regretted accepting to play the troll deranged version of Pokémon with his new alien neighbour, who had visited once and then had basically settled his dreambubble as close to Dave’s own as possible without the two merging (that had been a really bad weekend, and they had both decided never to let it happen ever again).  
  
In itself, the game –Fiduspawn– wasn’t that bad. The creatures coming out from the eggs were actually pretty interesting, and the fact that they were more real than Pokémon cards made it all the more exciting to play, though he hadn’t expected the alien spider-wannabe to try and munch his foot five minutes out of its egg.  
  
Well, he’d learned quickly, and now he could offer Tavros some good competition.  
  
No, the trouble started happening when Tavros had no more doll-hosts for all the eggs, because this wasn’t his dreambubble and he couldn’t conjure more out of the air, and of course stopping the game to go grab more was not possible.  
  
That meant he’d have to find something else to use.  
  
And unfortunately for Dave, who had been in the loo when Tavros had found himself in such an impasse, his apartment was filled to the brim with useless and colourful plush dolls. (The fact that as a ghost he didn’t really need to use the bathroom apparently didn’t do anything to stop his brain from recalling his needs when still alive, which meant his bladder still had a limit.)  
  
So, after relieving his ghost-bladder of the ghost-AJ he’d sipped earlier, Dave returned to the sitting room only to find Tavros gently cooing his newest set of smuppet hosts.  
  
It was, by all means, like living in a horror movie.  
  
The eggs Tavros had carefully placed inside the smuppets decided to hatch the moment Dave stepped back into the room, so he had a perfect first-row place to watch the monsters crawl out.  
  
One smuppet’s stitches snapped free from the back if its neck down to the base of its plush rump, and the edges of the smuppet quickly got drenched with the liquid inside the egg; Dave’s eyes widened in shock and disgust as what looked like an overgrown leech with dozen tiny legs pushed the seams apart and started wriggling out, squeaking a bit and then finally leaving its plushy cocoon with a happy screech.  
  
With a smuppet rendition of the movie Alien playing in front of him, Dave was left completely speechless, skin pale and eyes widened behind his aviators.  
  
Soon, more smuppets were ripped apart and more Fiduspawn creatures crawled out like Tavros’ very personal hell army, and Dave backed away from them, feeling nauseated by the sight and by Tavros’ happy cooing sounds.  
  
Noticing his presence, Tavros looked up, the perfect poster of happiness and parental pride, and smiled that toothy smile that always seemed to make some part of Dave’s chest melt.  
  
“I… thought you wouldn’t mind, much,” he stated, barely hesitating in his speech due to his excitement. Damn, Tavros loved his game. “Since there are, so many of those, weirdly soft puppets everywhere, and eh, they keep popping up even when you cut them”.  
  
(Dave had spent a couple days trying to get rid of all the smuppets, with Tavros helpfully giving him a hand, but they kept popping from thin air, more than Dave could destroy, and in the end he had to admit defeat, tired and nauseated and far too angry with himself and with Bro and the dreambubble. That had taught him there were many ways to get rid of smuppets, and he guessed he’d let his sadistic side out a bit too much by the time he’d given up.)  
  
A small mix of a lizard and a dog yapped up at Dave, still trapped halfway through the mouth of a blue smuppet, and Dave wondered how bad it would be for his persona if he started crying.  
  
Knowing Tavros knew he was not really cool, he guessed it wouldn’t ruin his pride all the much.  
  
“Uh… Dave? Is everything ok?”  
  
He was about to speak up, hoping his voice would not tremble, but then he glanced down, and had a clear view of a small horse making its way out of a smuppet’s plush rump, and then he was outta there, the door of the bedroom slamming behind his back to try and stifle Dave’s screeching.  
  
Dave spent the rest of the day hiding in his bedroom while Tavros cleaned up the room from the Fiduspawn and the torn smuppets. Later on, Tavros shuffled into the blanket cocoon Dave was hiding into, and cuddled him until all was forgiven and promises of never playing Fiduspawn in Dave’s dreambubble apartment were carved on the skin of his body by soft caresses and gentle kisses.


End file.
